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Sunday, 20 November 2022

Argonor’s Saga – The Beekeepers Revenge.

THE VIKINGS ARE COMING – well to be specific it’s actually a mixed force of Danes and West Saxons are coming and they’re raiding Swedes in Uppsala but it’s not quite as catchy as THE VIKINGS ARE COMING.

A few years ago I played a game, The Honey Trap or the start of Argonors Saga. In the Saga, a ship load of Swedes under the command of Rolf were returning home to Uppsala after unsuccessfully raiding along the coast of Anglia and Northumbria. Rolf was desperate to recover his bad fortune, his men had taken to calling him Rolf the Unlucky, (behind his back of course), but he knew this would bring shame and disrespect to his name.

He made the decision to raid the farmstead of Argonor, a famous Danish warrior and a most successful Viking.

In Dane-Mark where ever men gathered they talked of Argonor the Mead Maker, the Mead Drinker, Argonor the Story Teller, the Weaver of Tales, the Man of many Threads.

Argonor was famous for his wealth which came from brewing Mead a fine potent drink, which came from his bees, which were a rare commodity in 9th and 10th century Dane Mark.

Rolf had not heeded Argonor’s warning “Raiding the bee-keeper's homestead for mead is an obvious thing to do - but I should probably warn you, that this brewer has swords, shield, mail tunic, and a Gjermundbu-helmet (and a well-sized beard to show his status as an old warrior)”

Rolf’s decision was a decision, but it turned out to be a bad decision and he was lucky to escape with his life and some small quantity of Argonor’s wealth.

The story grew with the passing of time into the epic tale of Argonor almost single-handedly defeating the Swedish raiding party. Their numbers grew from 1 shipload of 50 men (half of whom guarded the ship) into a small fleet and he had killed countless men that day, all the rest had fled back to their ships to escape his wrath.

Argonor knew better; he knew the truth, it had been a close call, he had nearly been killed or captured himself but he reasoned there was no need to dispel these stories. No one would risk raiding his farmstead now that his reputation as a fearsome warrior was so well established but even so the raid made him uneasy. He felt the insult from that raid and it still rankled with him, he was determined to settle the score one day.

That raid occurred 5 years ago and he wasn’t getting any younger. Autumn was on the land and with another winter in prospect he knew time was no longer on his side, this year he must exact his revenge.

The perfect opportunity arose when he was visited by two old friend’s Eorl Uthred Snappison and the adventurer Vagabond Skallagrimson.

Snappison was a West Saxon and had landholdings in Defenascír, he was a seasoned warrior, prepared to stand all day in the Shield Wall, 2nd or 3rd rank preferred, unless there was a 4th, but was new to the idea of sailing to a strange land and taking what he wanted when he arrived.

Skallagrimson however was a far more seasoned sailor and raider; if it wasn’t nailed down he would take it. If it was nailed down, he would use a crowbar to release it and then take it. You may have heard of a famous Viking warrior and poet – Egill Skallagrimson and if not your education is sorely lacking and you will need to read his Saga. I’m not saying Egill and Vagabond were related but they had the same attitude and father’s name.

When Argonor proposed the raid, both men just smiled, nodded, and asked – when do we leave?

Should you be so bored as to read the account of The Honey Trap you might be confused when you see some of the same figures appearing in this account but having decidedly different names to the previous account. You will have to put this down to your inaccurate eyesight and the fact that Saga accounts are sometimes a little unreliable, historically speaking.


The previous pictures show Rolf’s village, he was a Christian and had built a church in the Anglo-Saxon style, probably because he had an Anglo-Saxon Priest but we’ll never know the true reason. His Long House was typical of the time and reflected his status as a man of substance.

Taking his lead from Argonor he’d tried to amass wealth and prestige by building hives for his bees and then taking their honey to make Mead. Sadly he was stung repeatedly the damp weather didn’t suit the bees and his mead turned sour. Then he passed the bee keeping on to Harrald, Harrald was a 7ft tall warrior, not a bee keeper and felt insulted by this demeaning task, he left Rolf s service and went to seek another Lord.

He travelled far to serve the only man he considered worthy of his loyalty. He went to Dane-Mark. He went to Argonor.

Here, he is returning to Uppsala to take revenge on the worthless worm Rolf. Harrald Horned Helmet is the man with the horned helmet, but you probably guessed that.

Vagabond Skallagrimson is the chap in the green tunic with the long flowing grey hair. (He wishes) and the prancing horse banner belongs to Argonor, who is in the distance with the double handed axe. Argonor is a canny warrior and has left a large force to guard his Dragon ship – Wave Dancer. His men forge forward but there are only 9 warriors, maybe he has become a little cautious as he’s grown older. (Or maybe it was just poor dice rolling)

Uthred Snappison in his purple tunic is related to royalty. Well he says it is so and it’s a brave man who will dispute the claim. The semi naked chap next to him is his faithful servant and Skáld, Fyrndagas Sweota, Old Scrotum to those who don’t read Old English.

Steapa and Leofric his trusted lieutenants accompany him. (I’m not sure which is which but I think the man with 2 heads is Steapa, he’s 2nd from the right in the front line).

Snappison had a better dice roll and has 15 men with him, although I thought it was 18. Snappison with only 10 fingers and thumbs has trouble once it goes above that number.

My men see the church and quicken their pace. They are here to exact revenge; Rape, Burn and Pillage are their maxims but not necessarily in that order. Today the first is going to take too much time, the third is going to be profitable and the second will be spectacular as well as roasting their chestnuts. Either of the last two items on the agenda will gain points towards a win, the first will just get you killed when more of the enemy arrive.

We are playing co-operatively against the Swedes but are in competition with each other to see who gets the most fame and wealth from the raid. (Fame is burning things and wealth is obvious)

Snappison leads his men along the lane into the heart of Rolf’s village. This lane is working like a funnel and we all know what happens at the end of a funnel.

There are only 5 men in the homestead, Rolf is somewhere about, but I believe he was asleep in his long house.

These men are seasoned warriors; they take one look at the number of Saxons coming down the lane and….

Charge forward, blocking the funnel.

They hold the line between 2 daub and wattle dwellings, the fight is long and tough. The shield walls push back and forth but no one gains the advantage. Rolf heard the clash of steel and rushing from his slumber hasn’t had time to don his shirt and so fights Berserk, swinging his large club one handed.

Snappison caught by surprise, fights in the front rank, his long bushy beard swaying left to right as he flails about him with his long sword, Serpent Breath. He tries to reach Rolf but the press of men is too great and he concentrates on staying alive and killing the man in front of him.

Steapa waves his 2nd head in the face of one of Jarl Rolf’s men; this doesn’t ingratiate him with the man.

With their eye on the prize, they are here to loot and burn not fight, Argonor’s small force climbs over the fence beside the church and prepare to enter.

Will the door be locked and barred – they won’t know until they try it.

The press of men between the houses is so tight that it might appear as if nothing has happened but Steapa is down, split in two by the man who didn’t like a 2nd head waved in his direction and one of Rolf’s men has also fallen as the fight continues.

As Argonor’s men exit the church some of them are carrying small but valuable items of loot. There’s no sign of Harrald Horned Helmet, who must be busy gnawing on some poor priests bones or maybe collecting some larger treasure from within the church.

Vagabond Skallagrimson looks on in disbelief, how can 6 Swedes hold up 15 Saxons. Then he realises, “how can they not”. Swedes are Northerners, forged in Ice and Fire, they’re a force to be reckoned with; the Saxons from Wessex are just softie southerners.

The reality is that the Vikings are veterans of countless fights, skirmishes and battles, even harking back as far as WRG 4th edition but the West Saxons are in their first fight, the paint on their shields is barely dry. It’s no wonder they are looking a little shaky and unsure how this form of warfare should be played, besides, we are using my rules.

Snappison was so busy fighting in the front rank that he lost control of the action. Eventually; pushing his opponent back he realised that most of his men in reserve are just shouting encouragement to the front rank fighters.

Get round the back of these turnip eaters he shouted at them and reluctantly his 2nd 3rd rank moved to outflank the Swedes. Climbing two fences slowed them down a little and they still haven’t got into place yet.

Before the men of Wessex can reach the action there’s a roar of “With me” from Argonor and the four of them crash into the rear of the Swedish line, the men of Uppsala stand no chance and those that are not slain surrender. “Good to see you at last” puffs Snappison as some of his men disappear into a small hut looking for loot but the main body can be seen in the distance about to enter the Long House.

I think they finally realized that this is a raid for loot and glory, not a long hard slog against determined foes.

Harrald Horned Helmet finally leaves the church following the men with the loot. He leaves it burning fiercely, he’s obviously read the scenario conditions and a burned out church is worth a lot of points, also he’s a devout Pagan.

Two of Snappison’s men are carrying sacks of grain from the hut, the 3rd chap wasn’t strong enough to lift his sack or barrel and was left behind, grunting and sweating to try again.

The largest group of Saxon’s are now in the Long House and totally lose control.

Not shown for those of a sensitive disposition or who are easily offended but the women of the house prove more enticing than the wealth all around them. Snappison’s men are going to spend a long time before they can get on with the main job of looting and burning.

Unknown to them, the men of the Homestead are starting to return from the fields, in dribs and drabs at first but once Rolf’s neighbours arrive this small stream of men would become an unstoppable river.

Argonor and Snappison’s men are scattered throughout the settlement, the ones in the Long House out of control and the lad who has gone into the hut on the right also starts making eyes and some poor Uppsala maiden and will be a while before he can get on with looting properly.

In the hut on the left the weakling has still not managed to lift the barrel of beer onto his shoulder. Maybe he should have drunk some of it to lighten the load.

Middle left Snappison himself emerges from a hut carrying a small barrel of mead, lighter and more valuable than beer.

The various looters are slowly making their way to the ship but are dismayed to see in the distance, the banner of Red Orm, the first of Rolf’s neighbours to arrive in force.

The raider’s initial advantage in numbers is slowly eroding, have the men of Wessex lost too much time fighting and now womanising? The scales of fate are starting to balance on a knife edge.

Rolf (Lime green shield) has surrendered and is under guard. Harrald Horned Helmet has gone into the Long House, a man of ice he is not swayed by the debauchery going on in there and immediately starts to light a fire. His intention is obviously to burn the place down.

I did say he’d read the scenario rules and a burning Long House is almost worth as many points as a burning church.

Seeing Orm in the distance has galvanised Snappison (Purple cloak, Black plume) and he dropped his barrel of mead to join with his men. The chaps with the barrel and sack are Argornor’s men and they know better than to drop loot until it’s time to RUN.

Argonor’s Long Ship, Wave Dancer pulls into the beach. Those of you with poor eyesight might think that is Snappison’s glasses case but you would be wrong, it is indeed a shapely 44 oared long ship the scourge of the North Sea and Argonor’s delight. Well one of his delights!

Unconcerned by Orm’s arrival Argonor leads some of his men into the homesteads storehouse. There should be plenty to steal in there or is the word liberate, I’m not sure.

Harrald has managed to get a small fire going but not enough to set the damp thatch ablaze. The chaps making eyes at the maidens have run out of steam and are ready to obey their Lord’s angry shouts to “get the hell out of there”. Red Orm has arrived and charged straight at Snappison’s hastily drawn up shield wall.

Not able to carry the sacks and barrels from the Storehouse in time, Olaf has been ordered to set the rest on fire.

He’s also read the scenario notes.

He’s also luckier than Harrald and the thatch catches fire immediately.

Meanwhile more neighbours arrive and make their way through the drying hayricks nearest us.

If they’re quick they will cut off the raiders from their ship.

Just as worrying is another small group advancing from the far right, out of sight in this picture but they’re forming the classic pincer movement, that knife edge is getting sharper.

The fight by the Long House is fierce but the lines fall back to reform and taunt each other; the dead and wounded have been pushed aside to create room for the fighting men.

Snappison is wondering if he should have gone on holiday to Weston Supermare rather than visit his friend in Dane-Mark.

Harrald is having no luck with his fire but the raiders in the house are making their way out, empty handed but thankful not to be caught in the firestorm that Harrald will undoubtedly cause – eventually.

The Skáld Fyrndagas Sweota is among the fallen in the shield wall, who will sing songs of Snappison’s great deed’s if there’s no Skáld?

Probably no-one the way things are going. All of the West Saxons have dropped their loot so they can move faster and fight harder, the Danes aren’t giving up theirs so easily, there’s no points for dead Swedes.

The warriors coming through the hayfield have cut off two of Argonor’s men, these two are still carrying loot from the church but it looks as if they will have to fight for their lives in a minute. The other small warband is approaching from our right.

Just a dramatic shot of the same action. Sorry – we had a surfeit of pictures.

There are many more of the Uppsala men arriving, drawn no doubt by the smoke from the burning buildings.

They are still a long way from the raiders but closing fast.

Finally the fire actually has smoke, and we all know - there’s no smoke without fire, and the rush for the door becomes a stampede.

The Uppsala lads have cut off the retreat to the sea, Argonor has led 3 of his warband through the gap between the field and the hut and attacked the Swedes from the rear, I’m told this is a legitimate tactic to use, but what do I know.

The other group, the ones who have been out of sight so far, have finally come in to sight and attack the two chaps carrying the loot from the church. Are you still with me, I hope you’re not as confused by all this as I am.

Snappison is trying to make a fighting retreat and has pulled his men back a little as Harrald watches his handiwork in the Long House. He likes fire, and flames and the crackle of burning things, I imagine he’s a bit of a worry if you’re sharing a berth with him.

Rolf is being hurried towards the ship by a small band of West Saxons (on the left) who unlike their Jarl have also read the scenario notes and realise Rolf is worth points.

Red Orm shouts in exultation as his men surge forward, pushing the West Saxons backwards, they are taking a beating. Jarl Snappison is down, defeated by a blonde haired warrior and things are getting very sticky for the raiders. Snappison thinks to himself, “we should have run sooner, bugger this fighting lark” as blood seeps into his boots and makes a mess of his new cloak.


Ketil Trout has arrived and leads his men forward past the church. The raiders are now completely outnumbered and will have to either be very fast on their toes or very cunning indeed to get out of this.

The crucial fight is now between the men from Uppsala and the Danes of Argonor. Northman against Northman. If the Danes can defeat the Swedes they will open the way for what’s left of the West Saxons to escape. Of course they will leave behind their Jarl Uthred Snappison, his Skáld Fyrndagas Sweota, and Steapa or Leofric or maybe both, I’m still not sure which is which but I’m sure I’ll be told later.

The fight on the far side is between the two Church robbers fighting to retain their loot and their lives and four Swedes. Closest to us are the Danes, a Wolfshead, Vagabond Skallagrimson, a man with a budgie on his shield and on the far right Argonor himself. Argonor as befits a hero is fighting 2 opponents.

The fighting is hard and good men are hurt and incapacitated, Argonor was defeated, so was Skallagrimson but on the right the Church robbers pushed back two of their enemy and held the other two at bay, some small consolation in a rapidly declining situation.

With a roar that could be heard above the tumult of the battle Harrald seeing his new Lord fall, rushed to his aid, the Argonor’s Prancing Horse banner flying high beside him as the Bannerman waved it menacingly in the direction of the Swedes.

Rolf’s homestead is ablaze, mostly thanks to one man, Harrald, but the Danes and West Saxons are surrounded by the more numerous Uppsala men.

The fight had been long and hard but as daylight closed it looked like the end for our raiders, all the heroic leaders were injured and unable to carry on the fight, all except for Harrald Horned Helmet. A man tall in stature and long on cunning, he shouts for a truce, Red Orm and Ketil Trout agree.

“We have Jarl Rolf and will trade him for our lives” Harrald began. Neither Orm or Ketil like Rolf but when Harrald added the sweetener “and we’ll leave the booty behind as well. You can share it as you wish” - they both agreed.

So the men of Dane-Mark and the men of Wessex sailed back to Argonor’s Long House not richer in booty but proud in their destruction of Rolf’s Farmstead.

The Skáld Fyrndagas Sweota, made a swift recovery and by the time Wave Dancer made port he was half way through a long verse, mainly about the prowess of Jarl Uthred Snappison but the men of Dane-Mark knew who the real heroes were and they were all Danish.


So Argonors Saga continues, it would be nice to write another chapter of it sooner than in another five years time but who knows how the Norns will spin their web and change the fate of men, not I for sure.


This was the first of five games we played when the Mad Lord Snapcase journeyed northwards from his home in the hills of Devon to visit me in the wild fastness of the Derbyshire Dales. My Vikings have rarely been out of their comfortable storage in the last 30 or so years and it was a treat to get a few of them running round and creating mayhem after all this time. The inspiration was of course that Snappers has decided for no discernable reason to paint a few West Saxons and it would have been churlish not to have them carouse with seasoned veterans from the 70’s.

Hopefully you made it to the end, it’s a long story but after all – it is a Saga.
Cheers

PS It's also my 100th post.

Wednesday, 9 November 2022

The Great Escape – The Movie


Looking down from the hill overlooking the camp Snappers opined “We can’t let this go” Dougers agreed with him and the only dissenting voice was Vaggers. “Look you two; we’ve only just freed you from the clutches of the German Army, who’s left to rescue you if we all get captured this time.

He looked despairingly at Bunty and received a blank stare back.

These are my responsibility said Snappers, this is my land and they are my people, he’s never really got over the concept of medieval fealty.

Look they’re even interning the Clergy and the Sisters from Mother Teresa’s Nunnery or whatever they call it.

I didn’t like to point out that these were Catholics and he’d been at war with the Catholics ever since Good Queen Beth’s time.

OK, lets do it, how do you want to play it out I asked. He looked vaguely disconcerted and then responded, the same as always. Oh no, not the knock, knock who’s there I asked. Well is there any other way.

I suppose not, I guess you want me to be the knocker I asked resignedly. Of course old chap – you do it so well he grinned.

Knock, knock I smiled at the grim looking SS guard on the outer barrier.

What the hell do you want Gerda replied.

Err – I have another batch of prisoners for you I responded.

You’re not Jim or Fred she said, they’ve been driving the trucks with the Internees.

Err – no, I tried all of my charm but met a stony reserve.

Looking over her shoulder I could see the 2nd gate and wondered how the hell we were going to get in if she wouldn’t let us through.

Bugger off - she suddenly said when the dice roll finally went her way. We’d spent quite a while with me trying my charm against her brains but as they say brains will do as brains will do, although I’ve no idea what that means. We both realised what I was trying to do wouldn’t work.

Well I did all a man can do when spurned by a woman. - I shot her.

Yes I know it wasn’t such a gentlemanly act, I had a double barrelled shotgun and she had a bolt action rifle, but equality is overrated, never go into a fight unless the odds are on your side.

Go Go Go I shouted to Bunty who had been sat quietly in the driver’s seat of the truck. She’d been listening to her man trying to charm another woman and failing completely. She shoved her foot to the floor and the big truck leapt forward. Crashing into the big wooden barrier it pushed it out of the way like a piece of matchwood.

Gerda was down on the ground bleeding like a stuck pig, although I’ve never seen a pig stuck so not really sure what that looks like.

Don’t imagine it’s very pleasant though.

Even from where I was standing I could see the whites of the Italian Guards eyes as Bunty drove the truck straight at the gate. He raised his rifle but a little too late as there was a resounding crash and the truck burst through.

He jumped to one side and didn’t get crushed as the truck careered into the compound.

It flicked to the right and started to roll, Ingrid and Luca the guards jumped out of the way as did the Rev Green, he was surprisingly lithe for a man of his size and years, but the Nuns were caught unawares.

Sister Monica was killed in the blink of an eye and Sister Matilda was thrown 10 ft into the air before landing with a crunch and she was out of any fight there might be.

Reactions varied throughout the camp. Major Kamilla Altman of the SS was stunned but Amelia Frost thought that now was a good time to indicate her disapproval at being rounded up and interned in the camp. Her walking stick twitched and she really would have liked to bring it down on Kamilla’s head, but quickly realised that she was probably too old to start a cat fight, as she’d heard them called, and it might not have the desired effect, so she stayed her hand.

Ingrid of the SS and Luca both devout Catholics, although Ingrid can’t admit to it, rushed forward and tried to help the Nuns, as Kamilla a devout self server runs forward with her gun in hand to check the truck. She sees the limp body of Bunty Hampster-Crust in the driver’s seat and relaxes a little.

Most of the guards are stunned by this turn of events, although not as stunned as the occupants of the truck.

Bunty the driver is out of the fight as is Mad Patsie who was sat in the back. Snappers, Dougers and Spankers are still conscious even if a little banged about. They gradually collect them selves and make their way to the back of the truck.

Bunty me love screamed Vaggers as he ran forward to help his beloved woman. He should have been paying more attention to what was happening elsewhere, but love is blind and Fiore the guard saw him coming and fired off a single shot from his bolt action rifle.

Fiore is a bit of a good shot and even though Vaggers was running fast enough to break the 100yards school record, it wasn’t fast enough to outpace Fiore’s bullet and he was hit, - hard - and went down and wouldn’t get back up in this fight.

Snappers, Dougers and Spankers slowly climbed out of the back of the upturned truck. Snappers and Dougers being pragmatic men saw that they were surrounded with gun toting German and Italian troops and threw their hands up in the air.

Spankers though, failed her brains test. She’s going to do something silly. She should have run but instead drew her pistol and opened fire on the nearest guard who happened to be Luca the Italian. He was so surprised by this that even though he had his rifle at the ready Spankers was too quick for him. He was even more surprised when she hit him between the eyes and he fell dead. It was no consolation that she’s not a very good shot (she has other attributes) and it was just a lucky random 6 on the dice. Dead is dead as they say in the morgue.

That’s when the brown stuff really hit the fan and everyone started shouting, running and in some cases even shooting.

Retribution for Spankers ill considered action was swift but inaccurate. Giuseppe off to our left opened fire on her, missing by a whisker as well as everyone else in that crowded area. Of course Snappers and Dougers had already hit the deck, these old pro’s move quickly when they need to and that probably saved them.

I use a random activation, weighted to the best characters and the next to activate were Spankers and Snappers.

Snappers, who strangely has a very Anglocentric view on life, knows that a true English Gentleman doesn’t surrender one minute and then pull a gun on his adversary the next, it’s just not cricket, so he just stayed on the ground.

Spankers took a more considered view of her predicament and with the words that Arnie would make famous years later she shouted “I’ll be back” and ran through the gate and as far down the road as her legs could carry her. Until recently she’d been a pretty handy 100m sprinter and indeed one of Snappers prized possessions is a photograph of her in the Berlin Harriers running kit. The flying boots that she’s taken to wearing lately hardly slowed her at all and she was covering a lot of ground very quickly.

A few bullets whizzed past her, but the guards were winded having to run to get into position to fire and nothing came anywhere near her.


Well the two old Duffers, I mean hero’s are incarcerated again, this time in a place a little more secure than a cellar in Greater Snoring.

No one has escaped from the Cooler – yet. Of course they are the first English occupants of the place so that’s not such a daunting fact as it might seem. Given a teaspoon and a bit of wood they will soon have a tunnel underway.


The small hospital is full to over flowing, patients are laying on the floor because there aren’t enough beds and of course there is no nursing staff either. Sister Matilda who has the skills might have helped out if Bunty hadn’t run her over and was a little miffed that she was sharing the floor with the erstwhile Bunty and the other intrepid rescuers Mad Patsie and Vaggers.

Vaggers might have enjoyed his sojourn in the hospital with three young women if the floor wasn’t so hard and the wound in his leg didn’t hurt so much. There was the added disadvantage that there was no medication or pain relief available either, however :-

It was better than the alternative, as the Reverend Green surveys the 3 new graves and wonders who is occupying the fourth one that was already there this morning.

Well as plans go, trying to charm your way into an Internment Camp wasn’t such a good idea and driving the truck through the barrier didn’t work as well this time as it did with the shop window in Greater Snoring.

You live and learn.

Years ago someone called something like Affrik posted a number of games using the Pulp Alley rules and in one of these he has some Agents enter a Secret Facility using forged documents. Each encounter was a combat between the good guys to see if they could persuade the bad guy’s that their documents were genuine, or it might have been the reverse, it was a long time ago. Anyway I’ve always wanted to use the idea of breaking into a camp of some sort with the same idea. It obviously didn’t work here but now I have something to break into I’ll try and find his game report and see what his criteria were and probably have another go.

Thanks for reading – if you did.

Cheers

Sunday, 6 November 2022

The Great Escape - The Camp

There was great rejoicing in the frozen North when we had a visit from the King in the South. Well he’s not really a King himself but I’m sure there’s a Regal ancestor somewhere in the dim and distant past of the reprobate, who is known round these part as The Mad Lord Snapcase.

The celebrations lasted for days, virgins were sacrificed, goats and bullocks roasted by the score, ale and wine consumed in great quantities and we played five games, two of which I've already posted.

Unfortunately the other member of the Triumvirate Doug ex EM4 couldn’t leave his ancestral home, something to do with a pack of hounds and the fact that he gets a nose bleed when travelling North. I personally believe it’s down to the fact that the battery on his motorised scooter needs charging too many times to make it up the Great North Road.

One of the games we played is the new 02 Hundred Rules that the Mad Lord has invested in, and so he sent me instructions on the sort of terrain that would be suitable and Ibuilt it to order, so I thought I should show off. Show it off I mean!

If you read my story about the rescue of the Mad Lord Snapcase (Snappers) and Doug not EM4 (Dougers) you might be familiar with some of these faces, of course it was a few months ago and a lot of wine has gone under the bridge since then so you could refresh your memory it's only a few post's down. Yes - I know it’s pretty unlikely, but you might not be aware of the invasion of East Anglia following the British retreat at Dunkirk and this might make more sense if you are aware of it. Perhaps!!

They appear to be lined up in front of a wooden hut!

They appear to be lined up in front of some German Officers as well, what the heck is going on?

Meinhard Wenke of the Gestapo and Kamilla Altman of the SS haven’t been in East Anglia long but they’ve taken a distinct dislike to the residents of Greater Snoring and are keen to show it.

Following the fracas in Greater Snoring the German Army were quick to respond, rounding up anyone who might have been involved in the rescue of Snappers and Dougers and they’ve shipped them off to an old British Army camp near Thetford.

These camps have every modern convenience.

The ones for the inmates have no doors; there’ll be no tunnelling out through the privy in this camp.

The ones for the guards have doors and paper, well newspaper at least, but it does provide reading matter as you wait for natures call.

More internees are arriving through the main gate. Well it’s the only gate and has a strong guard to stop any escapees.

Gerda is the strong guard and she looks pretty ferocious. Somewhere there’s a dog, a big dog, a Doberman dog but I think Gerda is still more frightening.

The camp is filling up quickly as three more truck loads of dodgy characters are delivered using the locally requisitioned trucks.

There would have been more trucks available but something to do with a sugar shortage at the local shop and sticky fuel will stop most diesel engines I believe.

You can see why Wenke of the Gestapo and Altman of the SS dislike the locals so much.

Some work has been carried out clearing the local forest on the south and west side but it still reaches the wall at the back of the compound.

I wonder if they try and dig the tunnels, Tom, Dick and Harry will they encounter many tree roots and will this slow them down.

Somehow I can’t see Mrs Peacock and Professor Plumbovski digging very far.

Just outside the perimeter fence to the south east there is a rough wooden cross at the head of a small mound of earth. Your guess is as good as mine!

On the inside of the wire is a vegetable patch, I recognise Cabbage but not the other stuff, any ideas?

It looks like the Italians have been seconded to guard duties as Vito patrols the fence line. You don’t know who Vito is? I told you to read the previous story.

Ok that’s the scenery for the Mad Lords game. He’s been painting Commandos, SAS, SBS by the score, as well as German guards by the ones (I think he’ll be the British and I’ll be the Germans) and so there is a faint possibility that he’ll post about it here but as I’ve still got this set up on my table.

And these characters seem to be in the vicinity I might just play a game before I move on to the next element of the extravaganza.

What do you mean, who are they?

Snappers disguised as Sir Henry, Spankers disguised as Isla von Strum. Patsie Jones disguised as Mad Patsie and she seems to have taken a shine to Dougers, disguised as George, or Sir George as he’d like to be known. Bunty Hampster-Crust disguised as Hazel Arnesen and Vaggers disguised as William Morris that well known art and craft man.

I told you to read the previous story.

The buildings are all from EBob Miniatures, they’re printed card, glued to foamboard and are free. Free is good where I come from, although free usually means it’s been stolen.

Pip Pip as the Mad Lord would say.